real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize