i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
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