is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
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