Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
