Can Purell be used as lube?
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
