I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
It's just like the Real World with babies
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
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