I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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