Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
its liver damage thursday
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
