:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
