Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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