How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
