No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
