ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
