He is an equal opportunity slut.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize