I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
not ubering you a puppy
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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