no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize