Yo dont text me then not text me
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
