My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
where am i from again
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
