youre lurking in front of me
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
