there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
My bed smells like the plague
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
