ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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