Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
