He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
