that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Randomize
