Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
