the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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