Someone shit on the floor
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
