just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
