Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
well I can't set my house on fire every night
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
this hospital has no fireball
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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