You really coming over, don't trick.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
