I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
