If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
