I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
