Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
