ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
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