You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
