Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
