he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
