So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
