I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
