dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize