Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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