do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
