Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
