How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
