If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Randomize
