Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
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