Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
