Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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