can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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